Ep 0: Intro To Dare To Love And Sonika & Christian (Brief Episode)
This is a quick intro episode to tell you a little bit about us, about our philosophy, and what you can expect from this podcast.
On the Dare To Love podcast, we intend to share with you insights, techniques, and practical tools for improving and empowering all your relationships, from your close intimate relationships with your spouse or partner, kids and family, all the way to your social and professional relationships with coworkers, employees or bosses.
Relationships are often an overlooked constant in our lives. Unless you aspire to be a hermit in a cave somewhere, you are in relationships every day. Actually, even the hermit can’t escape being in relationship with him or herself.
To be a happy, harmonious, and productive human being, all of us need to be skilled at navigating our relationships, working through conflicts and harmoniously creating loving meaningful connections with others.
Relationships are unique in that they have the potential to either lift you up or tear you down. Your relationships can make you feel like a million bucks, full of love and possibility, or they can feel terrible, break your heart and make you want to give up.
When experts talk about relationships, it’s almost always in the context of marriage, if you are a couple, or dating if you’re a single person. And whereas those are called your primary relationships for a reason, we’re suggesting that your relationships are something that affect your entire existence, and that both the victories and the downturns in your romantic relationships affect greatly every other aspect of your life.
Here are a couple of examples.
A young couple called us. Jeremy told us, “We had hit a really rough spot in our relationship, I had my bags packed and was basically just going to get in my car and go. Luckily, we pumped the breaks and my girlfriend called the number we had for LoveWorks.”
Inside less than a year, this couple went from splitting up, to recommitting to each other and starting a family. They now have two young children and are happier than ever. And if that was the end of the story, that’d be a wonderful happy ending.
But in the process of working with our LoveWorks system, what they learned spilled directly over into their work world. Jeremy is a corporate manager for chain of restaurants in California. He’s responsible for overseeing operations in a region that consists of 6 locations and over 400 employees. Jeremy said, “My business relationships have completely transformed. Today how I communicate and follow through on agreements based on skills I have learned from LoveWorks form the basis for how I do business. Using these skills have in part contributed to my company having double-digit growth the past 3 years in a very competitive industry. My personal financial reward based on these skills has also been amazing. I have seen my income double since 2015.”
As Jeremy expressed, your primary romantic relationships are not an isolated island in your life. The skills required for being an amazing husband, wife, or partner are directly transferrable to your career or community life.
Another great example was a naturopathic doctor, Dr. Cari, who sought out our work because she was tired of being single, and tired of, as she said, “Dating the same guy over and over again”. She said about herself, that, “I pretty much didn’t know how to relate to anyone. I faked it….”
Like so many people in today’s world, Dr. Cari is an example of an extremely accomplished, independent person who’s successful elsewhere in life, but couldn’t quite make love work. After working with our LoveWorks system, Dr. Cari did indeed meet the love of her life. They got married on a sandy beach in Costa Rica, and they moved in together a few states away with his two younger children. Great ending, right?
Well, it didn’t stop there. Dr. Cari later said, “Working with LoveWorks has changed the way I am at work, with my staff, with my friends, with everybody, and it certainly set me up to have the relationship I actually want.”
Working with any of your relationships can improve all your relationships, and actually your entire life.
We’re here to tell you that you have a lot more power and influence over how your relationships unfold than you might think. In fact, we believe relationships can be uplifting, connecting, loving, and mutually empowering.
Your relationships have the possibility to be a place where you get to be and express more of who you are, not less. We believe relationships have the possibility of being fun and easy, connecting and uplifting, and that working on improving your relationships can be fun and easy too.
When it’s not fun and easy, when it’s not satisfying and empowering, then something needs to change in a productive way. Unfortunately, most people don’t have the skills and tools to make productive changes, so they often devolve to complaining or separation and divorce, or just staying lonely and miserable.
Even the most annoying people in your life, the ones that push your buttons the most, which of course are often the very same people you love the most, even your relationships with them can be used to empower yourself and to expand your capacity for love.
Daring to love means to be your best self while supporting your partner or whomever, to be their best self. Raising each other up, instead of pulling each other down.
That’s what the Dare To Love Podcast is all about. Over more than 35 years, starting with Sonika and the last 10 years with Christian as well, we have invented and developed a lighthearted and extremely effective body of work for how to create loving, soul satisfying relationships, with a whole host of practical exercises, tools, and techniques to make every one of your relationships work.
We have dealt with and addressed pretty much anything you can imagine in the realm of relating.
Whether it’s communication, intimacy, sex, parenting, long-distance relationships, divorce, step-families, recovering from infidelity, masculine-feminine power dynamics, dating and brand-new relationships, non-monogamy, conflict resolution, work relationships, dealing with teenage kids or uncooperative ex’es, how to be a better boss or a happier employee, or simply a more powerful human being, we have tools and materials for all of it!
We’d like to change the stereotypical account that working on your relationship is hard and tedious and involves endless processing before you see some light at the end of the tunnel.
We once had a couple who came as a last-ditch effort to our workshop to save a 30-year marriage. They had been through a couple of years of traditional couples therapy, and the woman said, “It was like walking through mud, with no light at the end of the tunnel”.
But halfway through our weekend training, she said, “Wow, I had no idea it could be fun working on our relationship!” It can absolutely be fun and uplifting.
It’s our philosophy that if we can help you connect in love, to make an intimate space, then half your problems will simply disappear on their own, and everything else will look a lot brighter and will be easier to deal with.
On this podcast you’ll hear from both Sonika and myself, sometimes together, sometimes just one of us at a time, and you’ll also hear from other experts who have unique and interesting approaches to relationships.
At times, you’ll hear us talk about or recommend books or trainings from other experts, and you’ll hear us refer to our own workshops and coaching too. We offer several different workshops on love, sex, conflict, and fear, and we offer men’s, women’s, singles and couples retreats as well. We have been coaching individuals and couples, men and women for many, many years through our live and online trainings, our private coaching sessions in person or by phone, and our audio programs.
Which is just to say that we are here for you, should you need or want additional support or training, whether you live local or far away in another state or country.
You don’t need to improve your relationships this alone.
The fact that we are a couple deeply in love after 14 years is an interesting love story in and of itself, and also testimony to the efficiency of this work. Because Sonika and I are in many ways a very unlikely couple. When we met, Sonika was 47 and I was 32. Sonika is American, and lived in CA, I’m Danish and had lived in Denmark all my life. Sonika was well established in life, she owned houses and rental properties and 401k’s and had been in business for 20 years, whereas Chr was starting over, had no belongings, career or savings, for that matter. Sonika had young children, Chr was looking for someone to start a family with. Let’s just say the odds were definitely not in our favor!
And yet, here we are, 14 years later, married, teaching and running a business together, parenting and “playing house”, and being wonderfully in love all the while.
We’ve had so many of the challenges modern people deal with. Blended families, and co-parenting with an ex, long-distance relationship – VERY long distance – financial ruin, we lost almost everything in the 2008 crash; Christian is an immigrant and that entire process is very challenging to deal with; we’ve had health challenges, you name it.
How did we manage all that, while remaining grounded, in love, and happy 95% of the time? We practiced all the stuff we teach, at our workshops and in private coaching, and here on the podcast. In short, we are here to offer empowering, uplifting conversations about the most important aspect of human existence, our relationships with other people.
We welcome your input or suggestions for topics to talk about. If you go to our website at loveworksforyou.com, you’ll see a Contact menu (here …) and you can send your thoughts and ideas. Or simply shoot an email to [email protected]
And hey, as a last personal note for this brief intro episode – if your relationships aren’t what you want them to be, if you have too much arguing and too little fun, friendship or sex, don’t let yourself get stuck in loneliness or feeling bad about yourself.
There’s always another option, there’s always an improved place to step into. You never need to be stuck. The Dare To Love podcast is here to give you options, to reveal new possibilities and to help you dramatically improve your every relationship!
We look very forward to being with you! 🙂
Sonika & Christian